


I Deserve To Be Rescued

by iamdali



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Airplane Crashes, Airplanes, Airports, Alternate Universe, M/M, Near Death Experience
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-11
Updated: 2013-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-19 03:54:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/879140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamdali/pseuds/iamdali
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gerard’s eyes are promising. They’re going to get through this, it’s going to be ok, for him, for Frank, for his brother and his future brother in-law sat several rows behind and everyone else on this plane…he’s decided that they’re all getting through this, because it’s taken the most horrifying few minutes of his life to realise that he’s been wasting his life, and that the new one, the one he’s always wanted but always been too afraid to take, lies with the person in his arms.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Deserve To Be Rescued

The edges of life have never felt as precious beneath Gerard’s fingertips as he clings on to them with both hands, arms wrapped so tightly around Frank that the pressure feels almost bone breaking. The sobs and gasps from the other passengers are all around him, and even through the ear wrecking noise of the wind gushing through the cabin from the gash in the ceiling and the groaning of the plane as it dives towards the earth, they’re almost deafening. 

Frank looks up at him; face so pale and fragile looking with the bright orange oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. His eyes are wide and frightened, speaking louder to Gerard than the people around them. He reaches up to touch Gerard’s face, just fingers grazing down his cheek but with the pressure of the cabin already pressing against their bodies it feels more like a punch. Gerard doesn’t care. He clasps his fingers around Frank’s hand and squeezes. 

Gerard’s eyes are promising. They’re going to get through this, it’s going to be ok, for him, for Frank, for his brother and his future brother in-law sat several rows behind and everyone else on this plane…he’s decided that they’re all getting through this, because it’s taken the most horrifying few minutes of his life to realise that he’s been wasting his life, and that the new one, the one he’s always wanted but always been too afraid to take, lies with the person in his arms. 

 

Several rows back Ray and Mikey are practically entangled, arms tight and hands grasping. They’re not letting go for anything. Ray presses his forehead to Mikey’s, their masks knocking awkwardly together. 

_I’m sorry_ Ray wants to tell his fiancé. _I’m so, so sorry_ he’s desperate to say because he is. More sorry than he has ever been. He sees it now. How could he have been so stupid? This man is the most caring, most loving and most important man in his life and how can he not want to give him everything he wants, everything he deserves? 

_ Two Hours Earlier _

Ray hates parking at airports. The spaces always seem smaller, and he doesn’t exactly drive a fucking tank but it always takes some awkward manoeuvring to get the car nestled safely between the BMW and a Land Rover. Airport car parks also make his car look like a piece of crap. 

“I’m just saying,” Mikey starts up again as Ray flicks off the engine, “I’m marrying you, not your mother, so I don’t see why she gets a say in every aspect of _our_ day.” 

Ray sighs. “Come on, hun. It’s the only time she’s ever shown any enthusiasm towards this wedding. Just let her help a little?” 

“A little?” Mikey gasps. “Ray, she wants to move our wedding across the fucking country!” 

There’s an awkward silence from the back seat of the car as Frank and Gerard watch the argument unfold, as they have done for the entire half hour ride to the airport. _Maybe we should have taken a cab_ Frank’s raised eyebrows seem to say. 

Gerard’s been having an argument of his own, only his is much more private and only involving himself. Frank makes an amused face and grins at Gerard, who quickly smiles back before mentally slapping himself. 

_Even his goofy faces are beautiful! Just say yes, you utter fucking moron._

Since the first time they met approximately three years ago when Mikey and Ray first started dating, Frank’s asked him out almost every time they’ve hung out. He’s gone from suggesting movies and dinner to cups of coffee and bowling nights – anything just to get them hanging out alone. Frank likes him, Frank likes him a lot that even Gerard knows it’s obvious. Just likes it’s obvious that Gerard likes Frank. Gerard _really_ likes Frank. How the hell could he not? Frank is funny and cute and sweet and fucking _gorgeous_. He talks about things that fascinate Gerard, and listens like he’s going to learn some valuable life lesson from every word that Gerard says, even when they’re just geeking out over Friday 13 reruns on the horror channel. 

But Gerard is…well, to put it plainly, he’s a fucking pussy. His track record has not been the best, relationship wise and everything else. And no matter how many times that Mikey tries to tell him that his past is exactly that, the _past_ , Gerard still hasn’t forgiven himself for the person he used to be. Frank knows about it, they’ve talked about it before and Gerard is one hundred percent sure that Mikey’s talked about it with Frank, probably in explanation of why his brother is such a giant douche bag. 

Whilst Mikey and Ray continue to bicker, Frank and Gerard pull their cases from the trunk of the car and head for departures. 

They’re going home to Jersey for their annual January visit. This is the first time Frank’s flown with them as he usually spends every Christmas in Jersey with his family and every Christmas, Gerard misses him like hell. 

“If these two are still arguing when we get to check in, I’m calling Brian,” Frank grumbles. Brian is the founder of Radiation Records and Mikey’s boss. He’s also the guy that first hired Frank and Ray as session musicians, hence being responsible for the start of Mikey and Ray’s relationship and all the arguments that followed. He also takes no shit from anyone and can be one hell of a scary ass motherfucker when he’s pissed off. Brian thought it was pretty hysterical, his company hiring what must surely be the only Jersey boys living in LA. (Well, except Gerard who had been tempted out there a year earlier with a comic book offer he just couldn’t refuse.) Boy did that plan back fire because now his best session guitarist and manager of media relations are either bickering in the conference room or making out in one of the studios. 

Gerard laughs. “Dude, I’m already dialling.” 

They have in fact stopped by the time they reach check in, but quickly resume once they clear security. Gerard groans as the pair wander off towards the departure lounge, completely unaware that the rest of their group has stopped. 

“You wanna ditch these assholes and go get coffee?” Frank suggests. Gerard pauses, suddenly feeling very twitchy. “Oh come on,” Frank sighs. “It’s just fucking coffee, man. I’m not going to jump you or anything.” 

Gerard blushes, mostly because he really wouldn’t mind if Frank did just that. “Uh, yeah. Sure…ok. Coffee.” 

 

“Your mother has been sceptical of our relationship since day one, how does that earn her the right to dictate the whole of our wedding?” Mikey says, throwing up his hands as he collapses in to a seat. 

Ray sits opposite. “Exactly. And now she’s actually showing interest. Shouldn’t we take what we can get?” 

Mikey scowls across the isle between them. “So that’s how it’s going to be, huh? We let your mom control everything just to keep her happy?”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” Ray tries, but it’s no use. “She’s not trying to control everything.”

“And how the hell would you know?” Mikey snaps back. “You haven’t exactly had much involvement in the wedding planning have you?”

It’s true. Mikey’s had to suffer through countless skype calls and phone calls from one Mrs. Toro about napkins and flower arrangements and place settings. She even came out to LA two months ago to _personally_ make Mikey’s life a living hell as they embarked on a weekend of wedding fairs that Ray had to work through. Mikey _knows_ Ray’s mother hates him. She’s picked apart every one of Mikey’s suggestions for his own god damn wedding day and has all but humiliated him in front of several wedding planners with detailed explanations of why she knows better than some young, love struck boy. 

“Yeah, I am love struck,” Mikey had said to her, “I’m in love with your son and I’m trying to make this a perfect day for us.”

Mrs. Toro had pursed her lips and picked up the glass of complimentary champagne to take a sip before replying, “Yes, Michael, and I’m here to make sure you don’t mess it up.”

“That’s not fair,” Ray says, but there’s no conviction. “You know I’ve been working a lot. I’ve had to. You know how busy we’ve been.” 

Mikey folds his arms tight across his chest. “Yeah, that worked out well for you, didn’t it?” 

Ray feels too dejected to reply. 

 

In a coffee shop opposite, Gerard is drumming his fingertips against the side of his black coffee as Frank stares in to his own latte. _Well_ Gerard thinks, _this isn’t awkward at all._

“Its not that bad is it? The thought of going on a date with me.” 

Frank’s voice is quiet and sad and it makes Gerard almost not want to look at him…but he does. Frank’s hair is growing out again to the point where his ruffled fringe meets his eyebrows and Gerard wants nothing more than to reach out and stroke it back against his forehead. He sighs and scrubs a hand over his face instead. 

“It’s not that,” he says. “I think you’re incredible.” 

“So, what? You’d rather be friends? I’m not your type?” Frank suggests, and although he’s got every right to be he doesn’t sound annoyed or irritated, even though Gerard’s yet to give him a straight answer. Three years, and Gerard’s never given him a straight answer, just babbled out some excuse even though a huge part of his conscious tells him to shut up, man up and let Frank take him out. It’s just…it’s not that simple. Not in Gerard’s mind. 

He shakes his head. “No, it’s not any of that. You’re…” his lips are getting dry and he tries to wet them again. “You know, you _must_ know how I feel about you.” 

Combing his fingers nervously through his hair, Frank closes his eyes and takes in one long deep breath. “Gerard, did you know that it’s been over a year since I went on a date?” Gerard says nothing, even though he knows it’s been a while. It’s been the same for him too, for a long time actually. A couple casual hook ups over the years maybe but it’s never become more, mostly because Gerard’s never let it. “God, I can’t even remember the last time I had sex because I’ve known how you felt about me for years, I’ve been waiting for you for _years_.”

“Frank, I know. It’s just -”

Frank silences Gerard with a hand. “You were fucked up, I know, I get it. You’re scared of getting hurt.”

“No, no, that’s not it,” and Gerard reaches to cover Frank’s hand with his own. Frank’s skin is warm and it makes Gerard’s whole hand tingle. “I’m not scared about me getting hurt, I’m scared about hurting _you_. I wasn’t a very good person back then.”

“Mikey said you’ve been clean of everything for over five years now.”

“Yeah,” Gerard nods. “I have.”

Frank gives a weak smile. “That’s really great, Gee. So you’re not the same person you were back then, are you? You’re a great person.”

That part of Gerard, the part that wants to give in, its getting bigger again, its swelling and growing and it wants Gerard to move closer to Frank, to kiss him and hold him and tell him the truth, tell him that he loves Frank. But still there’s that final, iron clad barrier. 

“I haven’t been with anyone like that since then. I haven’t, I just,” he stops to let out a frustrated sigh. “I’m scared of ending up like that again, and I couldn’t live with myself if I dragged you down with me.” 

Frank is silent for a moment and Gerard tries desperately to read his face. He seems far too…relaxed. 

“Believe it or not, Gee, I’m a very strong person. You’d never pull me down because I’d never let you get like that again. I think I’ve known you long enough to see how the majority of you works, you just gotta let that last little bit of your guard down so I can show you that there is nothing to be afraid of. In the three years we’ve known each other, have I ever judged you?” Gerard shakes his head slowly. “Have you ever gotten the feeling that I didn’t want to be around you, even after Mikey told me everything that went on before?” Another head shake. 

Sighing, Frank pushes his seat away from the table and stands. As he passes Gerard, he squeezes his arm. “I’m patient, Gee, but I’m just a guy. And sooner or later, I’m going to get tired of being shot down.” 

Gerard doesn’t watch him as he leaves, just sits alone in the coffee shop with his hands around his cold coffee. 

 

He doesn’t see Frank again until they’re boarding the plane. Mikey and Ray seem to have eased off on the arguing, but Mikey’s still throwing glares Ray’s way every time his back is turned. Gerard’s sitting with Frank, of course, even though Ray and Mikey could probably do with some time apart neither one of them would ever admit defeat. 

Frank doesn’t say anything as they board the plane or as they take their seats. He simply puts on his headphones and closes his eyes leaving Gerard with the tinny sounds of Black Flag and the safety video. 

Just before take off, Gerard turns to look up the isle to where his brother is currently sulking, staring out of his window as Ray pretends to read a book, but spends most of the time sneaking looks over at Mikey. Turning back in his seat, Gerard glances at Frank whose eyes are still firmly closed. Inwardly, he sighs. This is going to be a long flight. 

 

Ten minutes after take off, an almighty bang shakes the whole cabin. Just a few seats in front of where Mikey and Ray are seated, a panel in the ceiling of the plane pops open, metal pressing in on itself like an opened soda can. The outside air rushes in to the plane, whipping past the passengers in razor sharp wisps. 

Instantly, Ray’s hand clamps down over Mikey’s as everything that isn’t nailed down rushes towards the hole. The seatbelt sign flashes erratically, and over the gasps and shouts of passengers, the cabin crew call for everyone to stay seated and put their seatbelts on. 

“Ray,” Mikey says, and that’s all he seems to be able to get out. Ray squeezes Mikey’s hand. He wants to lean over, but the pressure is keeping his back pinned firmly against his seat. He squeezes even tighter, fingers lacing together and knuckles turning white. 

 

It’s been twenty, maybe thirty seconds since the hole in the ceiling popped open, and already the lack of oxygen is making Gerard feel dizzy. His fingers are starting to tingle and his ears are swimming with blurred sounds like he’s underwater. Suddenly, the oxygen masks pop down from the ceiling, and without even thinking about it, he grabs the one above Frank’s head and secures it quickly to Frank’s face. 

After a deep breath, Frank frantically bats Gerard’s hand away, pointing to Gerard’s own mask still dangling above his head. He helps Gerard to pull it down, pressing the mask desperately over Gerard’s mouth and nose while he secures the elastic around his head. When he’s done they reach for each other and hold on tight. 

 

Ten minutes later, after a gut busting nose dive back towards the earth, the plane touches down on the runway of an unfamiliar airport. It’s a jerky landing, the plane skidding a little as the tires find their grip on the tarmac until everything comes to a gradual stop. 

There’s a moment of pause, of silence and nothing as the passengers look around the cabin as if to confirm that yes, they made it. They’re still alive. The whole place erupts with cheer and applause as people shout, whistle and sob with relief. 

As Frank removes his mask, Gerard tears off his own and kisses Frank hard on the mouth. Frank responds instantly, refusing to let Gerard pull away and instead fastening his hands to Gerard’s head and opening his mouth to him in a desperate and consuming kiss. 

_ Two Hours Later _

In the bright bathroom of an airport hotel room, Ray’s got his arms tight around his fiancé’s wet body as the warm spray from the shower rains down on them. He kisses along Mikey’s shoulder and up his neck, biting at his jaw and tilting his future husband’s face towards his for a wet, open mouthed kiss. 

“Anything you want,” he whispers, “I’ll give you anything you want.” 

“I’ve got everything right here,” Mikey replies because now he realises that its not where or when or even how that matters. The only thing he cares about is becoming Mr. Toro-Way, and forever being with the love of his life. 

 

Down the hall in another hotel room Gerard’s pressing Frank in to the mattress, sheets clasped tightly in his fists as Frank’s thighs rub against his waist, knee getting closer to his chest. He’s moaning and its incredible, the most amazing sound that Gerard has ever heard and he can’t quite believe he waited so long to hear it. 

Frank’s hand searches for Gerard’s, untangling it from the sheets and lacing their fingers together. Gerard doesn’t let go, not even when they’ve finished and he is heavy and spent across Frank’s chest.

Now that he’s got him, Gerard’s never letting him go.


End file.
